Here’s to you;
I’m gonna miss you for quite some time; your jokes, your warmth , your voice and laugh , your texts and how one message could light up my whole day.
I’m gonna fill myself with nostalgia, hoping and wishing it could’ve lasted until it hits me that it didn’t.
I’ll walk back to the place I first saw you, rest on the stairs only to look back at the time you first kissed my lips, and wish you were there to taste them again.
There will be moments where I will only want your hug, your smile and your voice saying it’ll be okay. And in those moments I’ll feel my heart breaking and that nothing can ever make it alright again.
I’ll look for you in some other eyes – brown too- or other lips, other bodies… but they’ll never be right, because they’ll never be you.
I’ll remove the songs that remind me of you from my playlist so I don’t put them on repeat, knowing that I’ll catch one of them on the radio on my ride home.
But… One day..
..One day, I’ll say to myself “enough.” At first it’ll just be words, and it’ll still hurt, but then it’ll hurt less… until it stops hurting at all.
Only after all of that, you decide to walk back into my life, know that I won’t let you in. and if you never come back…
…know that I won’t care at all.