I thought a hundred, yet a million times, before sharing something THAT personal on my blog.
You know when you go through a tough breakup and you don’t know how to handle it ? Yeah, well i guess it’s much worse than a breakup .
There’s this “guy” that i’ve had a thing for, for the past 3 years.
We’ve been on and off for a while now.. And that’s all i can say for now.
But the thing is, i found out that, that “Guy” didn’t actually “love” me in the way that i loved him .
I don’t know if i’m making you guys confused or something. but, yes, it’s tougher and more complicated than it seems.
And the hardest part, is that i gave that person all the love i had to give, and all the passion i had to offer for a person.
it was hard, i even found that out a day before my exams. so Yeah i can say i didn’t actually do GOOD in my exams. but That’s OKAY.
It’s okay, now i know the truth. now i can set that person free. now i can truly move on.
It’s time to focus on myself, on my goals and dreams, and let go of any kind of distraction.
It’s okay because i’ve learnt the hard way.
It’s okay because that’s life. I’ll get heartbroken and i’ll move on and forget about it.
Easy? No. But it has to be done.
I’ve learnt a lot. I’ve learnt that it’s okay to give second chances, third, even fourth. But, i know i have to be attentive, and give it a thought : ” Is that person worth it? ”
Because, while we chase a person around and try our best to “Have” them, somebody else is trying and giving the same exact effort to have us. To have our love and attention. And sometimes, that person is us. we spend so much time trying to make that person like us, when we don’t even like ourselves. we spend time trying to make that person feel good, when we don’t.
I learnt that i should put myself first, ( it sounds selfish, doesn’t it?). Sometimes things aren’t worth our time, our effort.
So ladies, ( and gentlemen) if you’re going through what i am going through, take a deep breath, and whisper to yourselves : My life is going to be so much better without X. I’ll learn to live without him/her. And i’ll enjoy what life has to offer. Because i deserve better. ”
Now that i’ve thought it through,when you’re in love or dating someone and all you do is cry, take a minute and ask yourself : Am i dating an onion or a human ?